Repent and be baptised every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost.
Acts 2:38

Jenn Finlay, OCD and panic attacks

In December 2015 I was starting to get really sick and having very unhealthy thoughts about food. 

In January I told my Mum something was up and by February I’d lost a lot of weight and was diagnosed with anorexia. I was just starting to get that under control and back to a healthier weight when I developed OCD. 

I couldn’t even do homework or basic things without having panic attacks. I had routines that had to be done in an exact way and if I didn’t do something exactly right I would have a panic attack. 

For example, there was a routine I had to follow to get from one room to another by first walking on the spot fifteen times. I would go up and down the stairs over and over again, trying to do it perfectly. My schoolwork had to be perfect. 

It ended up with everything taking so long to do that I didn’t want to get up in the morning. My Mum made a record of my routines for my psychiatrist and I began exposure therapy. This essentially meant a panic attack every time I had to face something down, with my Mum or Dad having to hold me through it.

One night I asked Dad to come and help me go to bed – I had started having a panic attack because I hadn’t done my routine. 

We prayed to the Lord that I wanted to have my life back again – I could only say ‘help me’. 

I woke up next morning and didn’t want to get out of bed because I just expected it would all start again, but then I got a little voice in my head saying ‘Jenn you can get up and you can do it’. 

So I got up and did a few things and felt normal. Dad said ‘go up the stairs’ (which was the really ‘big deal’ one for me), and when I was able to do it normally and without repeating it, we knew God had healed me. And I’m still healed.